Men: Seeking to Enrich & Magnify Your Godly Masculinity? Attend the ‘As I Am’ Men’s Retreat!
So many men these days are lost and hurt, trying to better understand what it means to truly be a man and what true masculinity looks like. Although our physical bodies have matured, many of us have never made the clear transition from “boy” to “man,” leaving us trying to prove our masculinity in different, often unhealthy ways. It’s no wonder so many men are finding meaning by either proverbially emasculating themselves by becoming radical feminists or by flocking to the opposite extreme worldview espoused by Jordan Peterson, or even Andrew Tate’s promotion of toxic hypermasculinity. But we miss the mark by seeking for meaning in these worldviews, as they all fall short of establishing our true identities and purposes, which can only be found in following and having relationship with the source of being and purpose: Jesus Christ.
One organisation, Discover Identity, is seeking to help men in their journey in finding their true identity by redirecting their focus on the God-man, Jesus, his teachings, and how he exemplified pure, godly masculinity. I recently attended their ‘As I Am’ men’s retreat, and want to give a review of my experience.
Centered on the teachings of Jesus Christ, his life and example of masculinity, the goal of this exploratory weekend is designed to help us shed back the often destructive layers of incorrect self-image and worth that the world and culture has shaped us to believe about ourselves and who we are as men and our masculinity. The goal of the As I Am weekend is to remove the scales from our eyes that may be obscuring our view of our true identity, of who we really are, and what true, godly masculinity can and should look like. (Sometimes, even good intentions and expectations that we have for ourselves can be inhibiting us from seeing our true identity and potential.) This is done through engaging in several deeply vulnerable, soul-searching mental and emotional exercises, activities, and reflections.
(Quick note: although the general theme of this blog is regarding same-sex attraction, the As I Am men’s retreat is not designed specifically to address this issue; it is designed for men generally of any lived experience.)
Here are the main points delved into at the retreat:
Identity
Brotherhood
Healthy Relationships
Emotional Literacy
Generativity
Christ-like Masculinity
During the weekend, I was joined my about 20 other men, some Latter-day Saints, some non-denominational Christians, some Mennonites, all of whom were at different stages of life, religious observance, and age, but united in a common desire to improve and draw nearer to Christ. It was a beautiful sight to see many of the men starting off the weekend with walls up, showing very little emotion, who, through the different processes and the vulnerability and healing experienced, eventually had this renewed light and joy in their countenances by the last day. The immense feeling of hope and love for one another as brothers by the end of the retreat was palpable.
The intense, deeply-profound feeling of connection and fraternity that was built among the other men participating with me during this retreat was significantly healing for me. It’s a level of bonding not often found outside settings like this, and something that I greatly desire to replicate in my friendships and with my connections with other men in my elders quorum, and my community generally. I firmly believe that most of our quorums are severely deficient in providing any semblance of true brotherhood, and that attending retreats, like As I Am, is a crucial first step in establishing a vision for what Zion-like relationships among men should resemble.
For me, this weekend retreat has helped me to enrich my masculinity and given me a vision for how I can magnify it in the Lord to bless my relationships with my wife, children, and my community. For me, it was an empowering experience—an experience that I think all men can tremendously benefit from, and should seriously consider attending at least once. I hope you, reader, will make the time to attend yourself, and/or invite a brother who you feel could benefit from this transformative experience. May God bless you in our journey to becoming the man that he has created you to be!
